Saturday, October 9, 2010

Have you gone Mental? (XLII)

Have you ever played monopoly and landed on "chance?" One chance you take is to find the card that says "Go directly to jail. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200." As I considered this funny little saying we have all heard I thought of it in terms of my depression-anxiety.

Have you ever felt like this disorder was like a prison from which there is no parole? I sure have. It seems sometimes that my whole bag of tricks is like keys on a large ring, none of which unlock the door. I do not stop using them because they lend some hope of getting out one day. I continue to follow my program and find relief time to time. I try to anticipate some relief each day and hope against hope that one of these days, one of my keys will open the door to this emotional prison which I have entered.

I just want to be free. I think its what we all want. I long for that blissful feelng of freedom that some of us get while walking on the beach watching and listening to the waves or lying under a blue sky near a grove of trees and gazing at the contrast of the green trees and blue sky. You may have other settings that afford feelings of freedom.

We all need this feeling once-in-a-while. Just a glimpse ... a fleeting glance at it. It may be a slight stirring in our heart when we feel it pass through us with its own soft and tender message of hope.

Look for this. Long for it. Pray for freedom or at least some transitory feeling of freedom. It may give you hope; the hope that one day the prison doors will fly open and release you from all that incarcerates your soul and spirit. That is my prayer for myself and for you.

Typos and all ... God bless you.

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